Texifornia Texifornia Jokes Texas Jokes You know you're 100% Texan if...
It doesn't bother you to use an airport named
for a man who died in an
airplane crash.
You use the phrase "fixin' to" almost daily.
Someone you know has used a football schedule to
plan their wedding
date.
You've ever been excused from school because "the
cows got out."
You can properly pronounce the town Mexia,
Waxahachie and Mesquite.
You can remember the name of the last state
legislator to introduce a
bill involving castration and he didn't mean farm
animals.
You know exactly what calf fries are, and eat
them anyway.
You can recall hot summers by the year they
happened easier than you can
remember your mother's birthday.
You think that people who complain about the
wind in their states are
sissies.
The only three letters scarier than P.M.S. is D.P.S.
You know that the true value of a parking space
is not determined by
the
distance to the door but by the availability of
shade.
You have owned at least one belt buckle bigger
than your fist.
A bad traffic jam involves two cars staring
each other down at a
four-way stop, each determined to be the most polite
and let the other one
go
first.
When you hear a tornado siren, you go out and
look for a funnel.
Your "place at the lake" has wheels under it.
You aren't surprised to find movie rental,
ammunition, and bait all in
the same store.
A Mercedes Benz is not a status symbol. A Chevy
Silverado 3500 Extended Cab is.
You know that everything goes better with
Ranch.
You learned how to shoot a gun before you
learned how to multiply.
You have had this
conversation:
"You wanna Coke?"
"Yep"
"What kind?"
"Dr. Pepper."
Do you have a Texas, California, or Texifornian joke you'ld like to share?
E-mail me at windhavenglen@hotmail.com
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